Tuesday, April 27, 2010

The skinny...

I have no idea when this baby is due. Some reports have come in at November 24th, others December 8th, none of them reliable sources so we'll just say that by the time Christmas roles around, I'll not be pregnant anymore. Or I'll be real real angry. We are planning to find out what type of baby is being created just now because I am weak, and if I'm going to sew baby things I want to know what color to make them. Plus it gives me something to look forward to in the bleak hopelessness that is pregnancy for me. I love babies, but good night, being knocked up makes me sad.

So now that I'm "out" (because frankly a beer gut simply can not be hidden with layers or anything!) let's talk about FOOD.

See, I.am.starving.

You might say, "Morgan go eat!"

And I will reply, "Duh."

Dude, I eat constantly. Seriously. It goes in and then I'm STARVING again, or still depending on how you look at it.

Take this morning for example.

Between the hours of 7:00-12:00pm I ate the following:
1 large bowl Life Cereal  (Thanks MAREN for the cereal!)
1 yogurt cup (it had chunks, mango, I think.)
4 pieces of toast (SLATHERED in butter)
2 oranges (they were small!)
2 spicy chicken crisp sandwiches from Burger King (oh the shame!)
1 value sized Fry (but I shared with the boys)
1/2 a bag of Apple slices (they shared with ME!)
1 large diet coke (DON'T JUDGE ME!)

And now, here it is, 3pm and I am nauseated because I'm so hungry.

It's very difficult being me.

Didja know that?


So, once Oliver wakes up, I'm planning to go to the store and buy everything they have, in every variety they have in an attempt to help me not STARVE all the time.

Here's the real bummer: I eat to keep myself from vomiting, I gain weight like a sumo wrestler, and this baby is making fat.

The End.


McEuens said...

I am very sorry for you. But I am glad the Life cereal (that you/Erin actually purchased) is being put to good use. You and Erin are the best friends ever!!

The Wolford Family said...

Glad it's you and not me!!! HA HA HA HA!!!!

Frumpybutcute said...

My darling Morgan, I am pleased as punch (unsure if that is red stuff that stains carpet or the violent blow. I suppose it depends on your mood) to read your announcement. I must confess that I am somewhat of a blogger peeping tom. So thought the decent thing to do wuld be to come out and say howdy! Your blog is better than our newspaper and I miss you terribly!-Michelle Speicher (*yes me...from Manhattan...Kansas...faux blonde...lived across the street...Yes! THAT Michelle)

Morgan -Ing said...

MICHELLE! HI!!!!! How are you? What's going on?

Yasmine said...

Yay Yay yay! Not about the starvation, but about the baby! See I guess my problem was I just vomited all the time. Maybe you should just vomit. It's actually a great diet. I gave birth and weighed less than I did before I got pregnant! You should totally try it!

Alisa and Jared said...

YAY! Congrats!! Oh...and I have NEVER seen you fat...or looking even remotely close to being overweight, even when pregnant. You just wear it all well :-)

TJDKG said...

dude i posted on this a while ago and it never showed up... i think your blog hates me.


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