I am not sure how to deal with this problem.
College funds? Nope.
Mission funds? Yep.
General Savings... HAHAHAHA!
Food for my children fund? NO AND I NEED ONE IMMEDIATELY!
Seriously, you guys. These boys eat as much if not more than Derek and I! SERIOUSLY!
The other night I was planning a very fancy dinner of frozen pizza for the boys and Lean Cuisines for Derek and myself.
Well, at 5:11 I went to bake said frozen pizza only find that I had actually already fed it to them the week before and forgotten I had done so.
AMAZINGLY that very day, we had discovered a Little Ceasar's Pizza just down the street from our house. I had made a mental note to remember that it existed in case of an emergency.
THIS was an emergency. Three STARVING, crying, WHINING boys, begging to be fed, swearing I hadn't fed them since 2009.
Derek was dispatched post-haste and returned in about 8 minutes. FASTER than a frozen pizza can cook and dang it all, it costs the same.
People, attention please.
They ate the WHOLE thing. EVERY speck of that pizza disappeared into their bellies. There wasn't even so much as a shred of cheese left on the floor for the poor, obese dog.
Every bite; devoured.
They are little boys. The heaviest, Henry, weighs in at 44 pounds. Spencer is a whopping 36 and rounding out my little monsters is Oliver at an impressive 26 pounds.
That is total, 106 pounds of boy. (And yes, I did employ a calculator to figure that out. SHUT UP!)
That is the equivalent to a small 7th grader. And they ate the whole thing.
And no one needed Alka Seltzer after.
I am shaking in my proverbial boots here. Every meal time its the same. They are HUNGRY. I feed them three squares a day PLUS multiple snacks, and yet they eat and EAT.
I am going to need a full-time job by the time Henry is in 4th grade to pay for all these children to be fed.
I need a Food Fund, STAT. Please send paypal donations to my email account, mmkay? I also will graciously accept donations of an eating kind. Little Caesar's pizza is a current fave.
Good Gravy. We're in trouble.